Healthy as a …..

I am back home and am coming out of the medication fog so I can now take some time to write about the procedure and the results of the test. To begin with I will just cut to the chase and say that the test showed that I am in pretty good shape. Even though I am on the low side of average, it confirmed that the previous tests were showing false positives. I am now cleared for a full excersize program to lose weight and get into some better shape.

Ok, that said, I am sure some of you want to hear all the details about the procedure and what it was like. If you continue reading I will be going into every little detail of the procedure. It’s really not that bad, and I do recommend reading it so you know what to expect should you ever have to go through it.

Getting Ready
The day started by getting up at 5:30am and leaving at 6:00am to go to the hospital. I checked in at 6:30 and was assigned to a bed. I stripped down completely and put on the very attractive and stylish backless smock. The lack of anything other than a neck strap I felt added that extra touch that would otherwise have been missing. An IV was inserted into the top of my left hand so skillfully that I seriously didn’t even fell it go in. To this they attached your basic saline solution for maximum hydration.

At 8:30am I was given the ‘cocktail’ containing a Benadryl and a Valium. This combo is designed to keep you calm and sedate during the procedure and then help you sleep it off afterwards. You are not asleep during the procedure and can talk to the doctor throughout the procedure.

The Procedure
A few minutes after the drugs I was wheeled into room where the procedure was going to take place. I slide from the bed over onto the procedure table. Basically this is a real-time X-Ray system with a camera over your chest that swings and rotates around to provide the best views for the doctor. Since they insert the catheter into into an artery in your groin area, there can’t be any hair for the tape to stick to….

Do I get to be shaved by some hot, fake breasted nurse bimbo? Of course not, James, a very large black man, had the distincy honor of shaving my nether regions. As I noted to him, I was expecting the return of the hair to be the worst part of this adventure. Next on the agenda was a nice, ice cold bath of Betadine. I began to wonder if they were slopping the orangeness on with a large mop.

Next up, it was time to numb up the entry point. A few shots of Lidocain were on the menu. I have to admit, that kind of hurt actually, but only for a moment. From that point you don’t feel anything at all. Once in a while you can see the screen that the doctor is seeing which I found rather interesting. As the doctor got into the different areas around the heart he would tell me that everything was looking good. There were three distinct areas that this took place in. The final step was to check for heart function, this required an injection through the catheter of a contrast dye, when this was done I felt a short heat wave for a few seconds, but nothing major at all.

The closure was about the worst part of the whole thing. They put a lot of pressure on the spot and then it feels like they attach about 4 binder clips to the spot. This was pretty unconfortable and lasted about 4 – 5 minutes. After this it was just a pile of guaze taped into place and I was done.

The Recovery
After being wheeled to the recovery room, I had to rest for three hours before being allowed to go home. There really wasn’t any real pain to speak of but it felt pretty tender when trying to walk to the bathroom. Karen drove home and shortly after getting home I passed out for a couple of hours. I should be pretty sore tomorrow and pretty much 100% by Friday or Saturday.